"If success is rare and slow, everybody knows how quick and easy ruin is."

-vanity fair


FUCK.
for lack of better words.
i totally soiled today.
it started off with a celebration lunch for my friend, then progressed to the munchies after 3 j's, and ended with a 99 cent cheeseburger from mcdonalds.
im so annoyed.
i was doing well, but i swear i think i have the shove food into yourself until you cant breath anymore syndrome after i mess up early in the day.
i skipped about every event i was invited to tonight. it was a combination of not wanting to see anyone and dreading alcohol calories. getting drunk takes so much these days, it just doesn't seem worth it.
the girls in my sorority house are being loud and shameless. i secretly want to tell them all to shutttuppp, your not skinny or pretty enough to make that kinda of noise or call that amount of attention to yourself. 
the reality is that even though that they arnt, they have the confidence. so i guess, yay go them. 
i think im going to fast tomorrow. my formal is coming up and im going with a completely random kid. yay. hes very tall and broad so ill look even smaller than normal. yippeeeee. 
ive been kind of naughty in the sense ive been leading on this grad student, i think he wrapped his mind around the game tonight after triple-texing me to come over with no response...ehhh.



p.s. R almost discovered my thinspo folder yesterday as she was trying to print out our harry potter (which was AMAZING btw) tickets. i was so anxious and she was so determined to get my printer/computer to work.

seriously using every last once of willpower to not vomit. fml.